Something interesting just happened to me.
I was walking down the stairs, carrying my laundry basket. I’m kind of short, so the basket hits my hips in height. As I reached the first floor— I live on the 3rd— a group of 4 guys walked through the door. I waited patiently, apologizing for being in the way. As I went for the door, the 3rd guy in the line looked at his friend behind him and said “Hey, get the door for her.” I smiled and thanked them. I then continued to the laundry room.
As I was loading the washers, I started thinking of it. The fact that those boys wanted to make sure the door was held open so that I wouldn’t struggle opening it with my basket. One tiny act of kindness was enough to change my entire mood because, let’s be real, who ever wants to do laundry? However, I’m used to things like that.
Let’s talk about my boyfriend. We’ve been dating almost a year and a half now. Starting from our very first date, until dinner we went to tonight— it’s his birthday— he has almost always opened the car door for me. Every time we go somewhere. As soon as we head to the car, he walks to my side first, opens the door, and then shuts it when I’m settled. He opens the door for me every time we enter a building. He puts his arm around me when we’re walking and it’s cold. He sometimes takes me out or brings me flowers just because he wants to.
Every single day, he goes out of his way to let me know how much he cares about me.
I don’t think he’s a special case. There are people out there who want to show their love like that. I see it in many people around me. My dad will buy wine for his girlfriend, just because he knows she doesn’t have a lot of money to spend on leisure. They have a glass of wine by the bonfire and just enjoy each other’s company. My boyfriend’s parents do things for one another every day. From their first date, his dad said “I am going to marry you.” And that he did.
Chivalry works both ways though. It isn’t just “a guy thing.” It shouldn’t be an excuse girls use to make their boyfriends do everything for them. I am chivalrous towards my boyfriend. I do his laundry because he hates it. He’ll help me fold, but he really doesn’t like to. I’ll rub his feet for him when they hurt really bad after a round of golf. I try to pay attention to things he wants, and if I have a little extra money, to get those things for him. Chivalry isn’t just a competition to see which guy can get the lady faster. Chivalry is a word to encompass exactly how two people should act towards one another in a relationship.
Chivalry embodies passion, devotion, kindness, courteousness, and love. It should be a word to describe how two people care about one another. As the times change, so do expectations.
And I expect to be just as chivalrous to my boyfriend as he is to me.
And he’s not alone. There are plenty of chivalrous individuals out there. All you have to do is to look for those qualities that matter. Chivalry isn’t dying; your expectations in a partner are.
With love, XOXO.
I Believe In Daydreams 